Another year over - BAM! Last January - planning my trip around the world, this January - buying tickets home. Yes maam, I am coming home!
In recent weeks I have sunk back inside myself and found escape in books and sleep. Home sickness has gotten to me quite a bit. It sneaks up on me through tiredness and introvertedness. To think I sometimes prefer my own company? News flash!
Tho, it dawned on me the other day that even "home" (as how I remember it) is going to be very different. Friends are dispersing to Syd and Melb, and apparently Weston Creek has developed (What the...?!). I can't stand change (I'm realising this a lot while travelling). I find myself fighting against having to adopt something different (ie. southern gun culture). Looking forward to relaxing to some familiar cups of milos, aussie slang and seeing the gum trees & kangas again. To think, I miss the 'sunburned country'!
What this year is going to bring is uncertain. Job? Location? Who knows! Last year brought a lot of surprises, both good and bad. Meeting a wonderful guy, while also losing one tragically. I'm learning slowly about how to manage the highs and lows of life. That my emotions should not be dictated by circumstances but my joy should be in God and the multiple blessings I have. I need to live with some uncertainties and just trust God knows what he's doing and will lead me.
I've also found this trip revitalising. I've been able to let go of past experiences and find myself capable of forgiving. It's nice to experience life afresh, have an opportunity to change without memories or people pinning me down. New voices in my life really helped me to see things differently and to see where my weaknesses lay, and how I need to change them. To stop for a minute, and have time to reflect without a constant barrage of social activity - has been quite beneficial.
This trip has shown me my limits - how travelling constantly takes its toll on me out and I need to remember to touch base with friends and home more. I also struggle with stepping out enough and exploring - despite the fact I've been to 3 different countries on this trip. It's crazy when you challenge your comfort zones how even though you desire to step out you also fight against it.
Anyway, cheers to a new year! Look forward to seeing most of you soon!
In recent weeks I have sunk back inside myself and found escape in books and sleep. Home sickness has gotten to me quite a bit. It sneaks up on me through tiredness and introvertedness. To think I sometimes prefer my own company? News flash!
Tho, it dawned on me the other day that even "home" (as how I remember it) is going to be very different. Friends are dispersing to Syd and Melb, and apparently Weston Creek has developed (What the...?!). I can't stand change (I'm realising this a lot while travelling). I find myself fighting against having to adopt something different (ie. southern gun culture). Looking forward to relaxing to some familiar cups of milos, aussie slang and seeing the gum trees & kangas again. To think, I miss the 'sunburned country'!
What this year is going to bring is uncertain. Job? Location? Who knows! Last year brought a lot of surprises, both good and bad. Meeting a wonderful guy, while also losing one tragically. I'm learning slowly about how to manage the highs and lows of life. That my emotions should not be dictated by circumstances but my joy should be in God and the multiple blessings I have. I need to live with some uncertainties and just trust God knows what he's doing and will lead me.
I've also found this trip revitalising. I've been able to let go of past experiences and find myself capable of forgiving. It's nice to experience life afresh, have an opportunity to change without memories or people pinning me down. New voices in my life really helped me to see things differently and to see where my weaknesses lay, and how I need to change them. To stop for a minute, and have time to reflect without a constant barrage of social activity - has been quite beneficial.
This trip has shown me my limits - how travelling constantly takes its toll on me out and I need to remember to touch base with friends and home more. I also struggle with stepping out enough and exploring - despite the fact I've been to 3 different countries on this trip. It's crazy when you challenge your comfort zones how even though you desire to step out you also fight against it.
Anyway, cheers to a new year! Look forward to seeing most of you soon!
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| Oh, How I miss you. |
Cynth, this is a wonderful blog post. My heart was struck when I read, "my emotions should not be dictated by circumstances". What a challenge! Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDelete-Marti
Just to let you know that your homegroup have not forgotten you!!! If you can bring back some decent real ale and stilton, that would always find a happy home here!
ReplyDeleteSafe travels! It helps us realise what it means to be a "pilgrim people".